Senior Personal Ads


Who says seniors don't have a sense of humor?

FOXY LADY: Sexy, fashion-conscious blue-haired beauty, 80's, slim,5'-4" (used to be 5-6), searching for sharp-looking, sharp-dressing companion. Matching white shoes and belt a plus.

LONG-TERM COMMITMENT: Recent widow who has just buried fourth husband looking for someone to round out a six- unit plot. Dizziness, fainting, shortness of breath not a problem.

SERENITY NOW: I am into solitude, long walks, sunrises, the ocean, yoga and meditation. If you are the silent type, let's get together, take our hearing aids out and enjoy quiet times.

WINNING SMILE: Active grandmother with original teeth seeking a dedicated flosser to share rare steaks, corn on the cob and caramel candy.

BEATLES OR STONES? I still like to rock, still like to cruise in my Camaro on Saturday nights and still like to play the air guitar. If you were a groovy chick, or are now a groovy hen, let's get together and listen to my boss collection of eight-track tapes.

MEMORIES: I can usually remember Monday through Thursday. If you can remember Friday, Saturday and Sunday, let's put our two heads together.

MINT CONDITION: Male, 1932, high mileage, good condition, some hair, many new parts including hip, knee, cornea, valves. Isn't in running condition, but walks well.




So there is this 75 yr. old woman that is looking to start dating again. She goes and places an ad in the personal section of the paper that read;
"Looking for gentleman around my age that won't run around on me, beat on me and is also still good in bed." 
The following day unexpectedly her doorbell rings.
She opens the door and a good looking guy around her age is in a wheelchair however has no arms of legs. She exclaims "You have no legs". He responds that he can't run around on her then.
She says "You have no arms!". He responds I can't beat you then.
She says "And you are good in bed??". He responds, Rang the bell didn't I??


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LazsRealm

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